I don't really know what to say. I always have lots to say, but not really in a logical sequence or ordering or, I don't know.
A lot of the answers I've been giving to life and it's various questions and problems have been, "I don't know." And, for the first time in a long time, I'm quite okay with that. I don't know what I'm trying to say right now, nor do I mind very much because I'm just obeying orders.
I know that God was the one who inspired me to get this blog started or re-started, if you will, and I also know that He doesn't want me to have all the answers at one time so, maybe after I start writing, I'll have a coherent and somewhat inspiring or interesting or something to s o m e o n e blog post written. If not, maybe I'll learn from it something I've never known before. Either way, I'm not gonna sweat it.
I've been wrestling the past few months of my life (as you may have noticed) with the question "why?" and trying to answer it in terms of an almighty God. I've thought long and hard, and I've come to conclude that God is who He is and I am who I am to worship Him. I've come up with a lot more conclusions than that, but that is among the many. I know that He's in charge, and I'm okay with not knowing all the answers. I just am now. It's like a complete release and all these things I've thought about or worried about have been completely taken off of my mind and my heart and handed to God so that all I have to worry about is Him and pleasing Him.
All His characteristics make me so okay with not knowing. The more I've struggled to find the answer to my "why?" question, the more I've realized that God is good, loving, all-knowing, eternal, merciful, and patient. This all leads me back to just letting go of everything. I mean, why not? I'm in the arms of an excellent mind and a very biggggg God. The earth is His footstool.... With gas prices these days, I'm sure we've all been understanding distance and just how far things can actually be. Think about this in terms of GOD. He's all the distance in the world, but that's nothing for Him. All I gotta say is "dangg," in a very teenage and awestruck way.
A lot of the time, my mind will freeze up when it comes to thinking about what to write in a blog post. When I come to blog just because it seems like a good idea, I have nothing to say... yet. It's almost like I'm experiencing something, and I know what I want to get at, but no words will come to mind for me to say them. It's at the end of a new experience or a new lesson learned that God's like, "okay, go ahead and tell em about this part," or "you can talk it out on here."
I've noticed that I'll go long periods of time without blogging much (not that long, really), and then EVERYTHING will just get blurted out in one, biggg, longgg, post. They must be a drag to read in a rush.
But the importance of realizing who our God is comes from our need to serve Him. We have to know who our boss is to know what exactly He wants us to do. I want so desperately to do what God wants in my life that I just want to get to know more of Him on a daily basis. For instance, today I recovered some hidden truths about God and today's religious lies. Tomorrow, I want to learn more. I don't know what I'll be learning because I haven't gotten there yet, and that's a good thing... because then there'd be no point...
God does things in His timing the way He does them for a reason. I pray, "YOUR will be done, Lord," because His will is good, pleasing, and perfect. Mine, on the other hand, not-so-much.
I love God, and when you finish reading this, I hope you'll love Him a little more too. If not, that's okay, because He's so lovable it doesn't matter if a post by little, ol' me didn't do no good for you. God is who He is, and I'm trusting Him with absolutely everything in my life.
One final thing before I leave for a bit (maybe not), I hope this made sense, and I'll leave you with something God's left me.
Think about all the times you've asked God why something had to happen in your life, all those times you've regretted past mistakes and wished you could go back and stop yourself from making them. Now, answer this question in response to you asking God why.
Why not?
Think what good would have been prevented had that one thing not happened. I hope you understand from this that, bit by bit, God is the one planning out the pieces of all of our lives, and He knows what He's doing. I trust Him way more than I have before, and that's saying a lot. Hopefully you've gained a little more eternal perspective on life and its sometimes random occurrences. byyeeeeeeee now.
ps. donchya think cell phone and facebook addictions have gone TOO far?? Random, but increasingly on my mind. I hope you could read that, I'm not used to staying up this late this week, so I am writing veryy sleeppppppppppiilllyyyy.
